You know what really grinds my gears

I hate when people use "freedom of speech" in America to say offensive words.

Yes, obviously it is not illegal to say "that's so gay" or "you're retarded." In fact I don't know many places where it IS illegal to say those things in order to offend someone.

The point is they are offensive, and if you use them you sound like a jackass. Obviously you are capable of saying them, and you may not even hate gay or retarded people. But that doesn't matter, you still sound like an asshole and I'm still going to lose respect for you if you say those things.

So if you want to actually sound like an intelligent, compassionate human being, search your vast English vocabulary for a more suitable word than "gay" or "retarded."

Thank you.

Slenderman One Act: Scene Four

Scene Four

You have cleaned up the cottage. Now You sit on the futon, quietly. Outside the door, there is a blizzard. It is dark. You sit for awhile, then the lights flicker, and then the house shakes (the whole theatre also shakes). You jump and scream, then pull Yourself together and get on the computer. You go back to Your social networking site. You update Your status: “This place is getting to me. I don’t think I can make it the whole 3 weeks. I think I’ll be coming home a little sooner than I expected.” Your friend comments: “What’s going on? Are you ok?” Another friend: “Call me if you need anything!” Another friend: “You need someone to come pick you up? :[” You pick up your cell phone and call a number. One ring, and then a voice answers.

Voice (on the Phone)

Taxi services.

You

Hi, I need a taxi to come pick me up at 46 Springfield road, right now. As soon as possible. Please. Thank you.

Voice (on the Phone)

Sorry, you’ll have to wait a couple of hours. We can’t send any cars out there right now, not in this storm. Call back in-

The voice cuts off.

You

Hello?

You wait for the voice to answer you, but instead there is the sound of someone drawing a raspy breath, and then-

Slenderman (on the phone)

Hello.

You scream and throw the cell phone across the room, it lands against a wall and breaks, then falls to the floor. You run to the other side of the room, stumble, and curl up in a corner, trying to stay as far away from the phone as possible. You don’t take Your eyes off of it for a long time. Finally You go back over to the computer and on Your social network. You comment on Your status: “Yes, please come get me, ASAP. I don’t know what’s going on but I tried to get a taxi and they said” The power goes out before you can finish your comment. You immediately run into the kitchen and search the drawers for the flashlight. You find it and turn it on. You go back into the main room and start packing clothes up into your suitcase. There is a low grumbling. You notice the grumbling and glance around. Your flashlight shines on the window, and the Slenderman can be seen in the window. You scream, drop your flashlight and break it. You run back to the dresser and pull a gun out from one of the drawers. You point it around frantically.

You

Go away!

The house shakes. You jump, and the gun falls on the ground, and goes off, shooting towards the kitchen. You run out the main room door and start running outside. You go into the audience. On the screen the audience sees You running through the woods. You trip, something unseen grabs Your legs and pulls You back into the house. You escape from its grasp momentarily, pick up the gun again, and run back out again. You shoot behind Yourself and run back into the audience (the woods). You fall down in the woods, and the Slenderman appears above You. You try to shoot him, but the bullets go right through him.

You

Please, just leave me alone.

A tentacle comes out of the Slenderman’s back and wraps itself around Your neck.

You

No, I’m not going to let you take me!

You put the gun to Your head and look at the Slenderman. He looks back, then tightens his grip around Your neck. You shoot Yourself in the head.

The screen goes black. Your life flashes on the screen. You opening Your Christmas stocking in Your crib. You taking a picture of the family dog. You wetting the bed. Your first paper cut. You getting pushed down by another kid at preschool. You getting ‘married’ under the swing set. You skiing on a small patch of ice, then falling and getting the wind knocked out of You. You racing Your friends to the big tree in the playground. You playing a soccer game. You taking a math test. You showing Your science fair project about plants growing versus what music is played. You failing to open Your high school locker. Your first kiss in the movie theatre. You in the school play, Romeo and Juliet. You losing Your virginity (different person than Your first kiss) in the back of Your mom’s minivan. You working at the Pizza Hut as a waiter. You taking Your driving test. You driving with all of Your stuff in boxes. You having sex with Your first time in Your college dorm room. You having sex with another person in the shower. You cutting Your arm with a shaving razor in Your dorm room. You talking Your mom at the door of Your house and mouthing the words “dropped out.” You working at Pizza Hut, again. You working at Wal-Mart. You cutting Your other arm with a carving knife. You driving in the snow, the cottage You are presently staying in, in the distance.

The screen goes black. Then there is fire on the screen. The fire crackling can be heard, loudly. The Slenderman’s face appears in the fire.

The Slenderman

You’re mine now.

END

Slenderman One Act: Scene Three

Scene Three

Not long after the screen goes black, You begin to stir. You vaguely comprehend the dead cat in Your hands, You sit up in bed, and then fully notice the dead cat. You scream and run outside. You sob outside, in the snow, and try to scrub off the blood and fur and guts with the snow. Even though Your hands must be freezing, You don’t stop until they are scrubbed raw, and You probably can’t even feel them anymore. Even after you’re done washing Your hands, You stay outside in the snow. You cry until You can only sob dryly.

Slenderman One Act: Scene Two

Scene Two

It is nighttime. Your futon has been pulled out into a bed. You have a comforter covering you. The cat is asleep in the kitchen. The screen is at first black, but as You sleep into deeper sleep, it begins to show what You are dreaming. In Your dream You are underwater. Currently, You are trapped under seaweed. You struggle to get out of the seaweed in your dream. In the real world, You are struggling out of Your comforter. You finally break free, in both the dream and real world. In the dream, You begin walking across the ocean floor. In the real world, You begin walking to the kitchen. In Your dream, You see a sea monster. In the real world, You are approaching the cat in the kitchen. In Your dream, the sea monster wakes from its slumber and lashes out at You. The audience hears the cat hissing from the kitchen. You attack the sea monster, ripping away at it with sharp fingers. The cat is screaming. You tear the sea monster in half, and black goo drips thickly through the water, over Your hands. The cat lets out one final, terrifying scream, and then stops. You lift Your arms up in victory, and bring Your trophy back to Your bed of seaweed. In real life, You are sleep walking back to the futon, the dead cat in Your hands, blood and guts and fur all over You. The dream screen goes back to black. You get back in bed.

Slenderman One Act: Scene One

Scene One

Curtain opens on the living/bed room (main room) of a small cottage in the middle of the wilderness. There is a window up center stage. Outside the window it is snowing. There are 3 doors; one right center stage that leads outside, one left up stage that leads to the bathroom, one left down stage that leads to the kitchen. There is a futon center stage, and a small TV down center stage facing the futon and away from the audience. There is a rocking chair up stage right, next to the window, in the corner. To the left is a clothes drawer. In between the two stage left doors is a desk with an old computer on top. The main room is only lit by a single light on the ceiling above the futon. The switch is next to the stage right door.

The light is off. Everything is quiet. Then the Slenderman appears, like a ghost. He is tall and thin, with too long arms and too long legs. He is wearing black. His mouth is sewn shut. His eyes are completely white. He is bald. His neck bends at an odd angle that no human could bend theirs at. Slowly he sits in the rocking chair, and rocks.

A person appears at the door. When they enter the stage, a screen turns on behind the UCS window (not blocking it) that shows the audience everything the person is seeing, from their point of view, as though there is a camera between their eyes. This person is ageless. This person is genderless. This person is every person in the audience. This person is You.

You open the door to the cabin and go inside. As soon as You turn on the light, the Slenderman vanishes. You bring in Your suitcase and sigh with relief at getting out of the cold. You notice the rocking chair moving and to go stop it, then check the window and wall for a draft. You shiver from the cold, and go to the kitchen to turn up the heat. The audience can now see the simple kitchen (it cannot be seen before now, and not unless You are currently looking inside it), with its 70’s style refrigerator, microwave, stove, counter and cupboards. There is also another door that leads outside. While You are in the kitchen, the rocking chair begins moving again.

You go back into the main room, not noticing the chair, and sit down at the computer. You wipe the dust off the monitor. It powers up with clunky noises. The screen shows the audience what You are seeing on the computer. The computer makes awful dial-up noises as it connects to the Internet. You go to Your favorite social networking site and update Your status: “Just got in the cabin! Love it here, very cozy. Hope the 3 weeks don’t go by too fast.” Your Mom comments: “Be careful up there! Keep in touch!” Your Friend comments: “Don’t get eaten by wolves!” You grab the remote and turn on the TV. The screen, as with the computer, shows the audience what is on TV. The TV is on Channel 1, and the 6 pm news is on. The anchor is talking.

New Anchor

And the bodies were found with the organs torn out and places into plastic bags. No identities have yet been released, but eye witnesses say the two were a couple touring the countryside.

You aren’t paying attention. You are flipping through the on-screen guide until you find an episode of South Park. You change to that channel. The episode is in the middle of depicting the gruesome death of the character Kenny. Stan: “Oh my God, they killed Kenny!” Kyle: “You bastards!” You laugh and go back to the computer.

You hear a scratching and a crying at the door in the kitchen that leads outside. You walk into the kitchen and open the door. You see a cat sitting there, out in the cold.

You

Oh! You poor thing! Where did you come from? Come here, kitty.

You make kissy noises as You coax the cat inside. It comes in easily, so You get it some milk from the fridge. You try to coax it into the main room, but it doesn’t seem to want to go in there. When it goes near the door to the main room, red eyes appear in the dark (that You can’t see). The cat hisses and goes to the other side of the kitchen.

1/27/2011

Last night I had another one of those awful dreams where I wake up still sad because I was so upset inside the dream, and then a few minutes later I remember what happened in the dream to make me so sad, and I realize it hasn't actually happened, which lifts my mood a little. But what happened is still really upsetting.

In my dream, for some reason Mom and I were walking down the road, and this road has shown up at least one other time in my nighttime subconscious ever since it happened, because it happened on that same road. The road never makes me feel disgusting in my dreams though, like you would think it would since thinking about it makes me feel disgusting. But nothing good ever seems to happen on this road. Also I was walking down the road in the opposite direction that I was driving when it happened, which also may be something interesting to note for any dream interpreters out there.

While we were walking down this road, and for some reason as some points I sled down the road on some sort of tobaggon type deal, Mom told me that she was getting married again. And I was pissed. And I think I was pissed because she was either re-marrying Paul or getting married to someone whom I felt was absolutely awful.

We got to the end of the road (and in actuality, we would have ended up at the creepy cemetery, but in my dream world there was the foundation for a house or something there) and Mom's side of the family was there getting ready for the wedding, along with my new step-father, and some of his family. And all I could think about was how awful all of these family members were to let my mom do this to herself. I tried to reason with her, but it didn't work.

I didn't stay in this dream world long enough to see them get married, but I assume they did.

Also, while Mom and I were still walking down the awful road, we had a spat about me living in the house for too long and about me always going back to the house during vacations from school. I argued that I had no where else to go, but she said she didn't want me around. This hurt me a lot, but I knew it was true and I knew I had to move on. But I had no idea how to, and I was scared.

I don't think Mom would ever actually make me move out though. But that has been something I've been worried about, where I'm going to live once I'm done with college.

It's Personal: Part 1

In the back alley of a small town you’ve never heard of, in a state you forgot existed, there’s a girl of about 19 chasing after a man of about 50. It’s 4 in the morning on a Thursday. Even the people who are normally up this late are asleep, except for these two bodies, and one other. It’s the end of winter, nearly spring. Nearly warm enough for the girl to be warm in her pajamas and fuzzy bunny slippers, but not really. The man has a military jacket on, the kind of thing the girl should be wearing. But instead she has nothing but her sleeping attire, and a knife. The man is unarmed, and therefore reasonably trying to get away from the girl with the knife who is out at 4 a.m. on a Thursday night in late winter in her pajamas. But she’s relentless.

She gets him cornered in a dead end alley. She should be out of breath, the man sure is, but she’s not. She’s calm, not even shivering in the cold or squinting in the dark. Her eyes are black holes. Her hair is long and dark and perfectly straight. She holds the knife the way they do in the movies. It’s a large, dangerous looking knife. The man is tired and, let’s be honest, more than a little drunk. He shakes and backs away from her.

The man decides to try and run around her. Her reflexes are amazing, she stabs him right in the stomach with the knife, buries it to the hilt and then, in an amazing show of strength, pulls it all the way out. The man stumbles, but pumped with adrenaline he keeps going. The girl tackles him from behind and begins stabbing his legs furiously. The man cries out, and gets stabbed in the throat. He tries to crawl away, gets stabbed more times in more places, and now the loss of blood is making him so dizzy he doesn’t even know where he is getting stabbed anymore, or if he still is at all.

“Why...” comes out of the man’s mouth, it almost sounds like he was just breathing, but the girl catches it.

“Why, what? Why am I doing this to you? Well, it’s not going to matter in a few minutes, but I’ll tell you anyway. I’m doing it to teach her a lesson.” The girl makes a gesture with her head, to nowhere in particular. The man looks around, where he can with his limited field of vision, but sees no one. But, as the girl said, it doesn’t matter soon. He barely notices the knife blade gliding across his neck, and doesn’t notice at all when he left the world completely. -----------------------------------------------------

Yeah it sucks right now. Maybe I'll go back and make it suck less later. But probably not.